There’s no such thing as a “perfect parent,” but there are incredibly important ways parents can advocate for their children—teaching them empathy, compassion, trust, respect, and honesty in ways that add real value to their lives, even in their lives. maturity. This kind of profound impact can be seen in the way parents model behavior, teach important lessons, and even support their children emotionally during difficult times.
While Modern parenting has certainly sparked debate in modern online discussions, there are several old-fashioned lessons that brilliant parents still teach their children that can add nuance to new parenting styles and initiatives. From teaching emotional intelligence to contextualizing self-care and self-confidence, sometimes the traditional way has more impact than modernized approaches.
Here are 11 old-fashioned lessons that brilliant parents still teach their children
1. Express gratitude for the little things
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By modeling gracious behavior, such as thanking their partner for morning coffee or holding the door open for a stranger, parents can ensure that their children grow up with a foundation of empathy to guide their interactions.
According to at Harvard HealthChildren who learn to express gratitude early in life will reap a number of positive benefits, from experiencing higher happiness rates to living healthier and more fulfilling lives. Reaping the emotional benefits of spreading joy, empathetic people appreciate and express gratitude for the little things tend to build better relationships, both with themselves and with others.
2. Tell the people in your life that you love them
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Expressing love can look different for each individual and unique relationship, experts from BetterHelp explain, but teaching children lessons about love doesn’t necessarily have to be complicated.
It may be enough to encourage your children to tell their friends and relatives that they love them. Reminding them to be grateful for small things and teaching them about the sanctity of life can be profound enough for young minds to form their own gracious mindsets.
3. Take responsibility for your mistakes
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Taking responsibility for your mistakes can be uncomfortable, even for adults. So it is not necessarily realistic to expect children to perfect the art of self-awareness. Instead, parents who teach their children to take responsibility for productive mistakes that lead to growth and subsequent mistakes that lead to constructive criticism plant the seeds of responsibility in their children early.
Of course, modeling that behavior—where parents take responsibility for their own mistakes and tell their children the importance of being honest and vulnerable—is the most influential for young minds.
4. Standing up for what you believe
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Giving children the keys to self-confident activism and an outspoken mindset starts with teaching them self-confidence. When children feel valued and celebrated at home for their unique identity, their fear of external validation and judgment prevents them from standing up for themselves and what they believe in.
Carey Wallace explains the best advocates – whether for political advocacy or simply personal confidence – tend to learn from their parents how to stand up for what they believe in. They were given the knowledge, tools and resources to do this early in life, cultivating an enduring aura of confidence.
5. It’s okay to ask for help
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Asking for help can be intimidating, especially for adults who have learned to be hyper-independent, selfish with their success, and inherently self-indulgent. Of course, it’s not all their fault. Children tend to learn to get along with others and emulate their parents’ success. If they are not taught that accepting help and asking for advice is actually productive, they fear it.
People asking for help and advice are generally seen as more competent by their peers, meaning that children who learn this skill early in life are set up for success in a wide range of arenas.
6. If you fall, get back up
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Reminding children that making a mistake does not equal failure can sharpen their ability to persevere and maintain a confident mindset into adulthood. Adult children who have learned the old-fashioned lesson of trial and error face challenges and curiously participate in conversations, activities, and situations in which they do not have full confidence.
There is power in discomfort, especially for young adults and children who are still developing their identities and navigating their personal lives communications expert and director Ashley Robertson explains. By teaching children this lesson early in life, you’ll teach them how to manage conflict in relationships, how to deal with challenges at work, and how to prioritize their own personal well-being.
7. Admit when you’re wrong
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Teaching children to recognize when they are wrong not only has a big impact on the health of their relationships, it also teaches them to be comfortable with discomfort. Even in high-pressure situations or when dealing with uncomfortable emotions such as shame, children who have learned to take responsibility and apologize tend to be more self-aware adults than those who are not.
By modeling this type of behavior at home leading with empathy in the face of disappointmentparents can help their children feel as comfortable in discouraging situations as they are responsible for their own mistakes, shortcomings, and passively hurtful actions.
8. Be kind to everyone
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Parenting consultant Albiona Rakipi shared that teaching children empathy is not always the easiest endeavor, as the complexities of human life, love and struggle can be overwhelming for a child without a contextualized perspective on the world. However, teaching them to lead with kindness and compassion in their interactions with anyone is a good start.
Not only are they more likely to increase their self-esteem through meaningful interactions with friends, peers, teachers, and even strangers, but they also tend to build healthier relationships that influence their identity early in life.
9. Respect others, but also respect yourself
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Teaching children to respect themselves and others seems like a basic principle, but it often feels more difficult to achieve this given technological accessibility, the self-esteem and mental health issues of younger generations, and of course modern parenting dilemmas like relearning emotional intelligence.
According to experts from Positive Parenting SolutionsTeaching children about respect begins at home, with parents creating a safe space in which children’s voices are heard and valued. In addition to respecting other people, teaching children about self-esteem and self-confidence starts with parents who already prioritize healthy habits in their own lives.
We learn to respect ourselves by watching our parents take care of themselves a study from The Journal of Early Adolescence. While it may feel like an old-fashioned lesson, respecting ourselves and others is fundamental to our adult relationships, our well-being, and our lives.
10. Honesty is the best policy
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According to the Greater Good Science CenterTeaching children about trust and honesty is fundamental to the health of their future relationships. Of course, in addition to discussing the importance of honesty with their children to teach them this lesson, they must also model honesty themselves and respond to their children’s dishonesty with strong consequences.
11. Patience is a virtue
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Whereas our culture runs on instant gratificationMany children today struggle with patience. Although it is much more difficult to teach this principle, in addition to technological accessibility and new-age parenting issues, there are several ways parents can model healthy behavior with specific phrases and actions.
By creating small opportunities to praise patience daily and model their own patience in the face of exciting opportunities, parents can ensure that their children understand the value of patience in their personal and professional lives as they grow.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations and policy and gender studies, focusing on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
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