Francelys Infante advocates for brain aneurysm awareness

For many Latinas – especially Dominican women – expectations rooted in machismo and misogyny shape us from an early age. We are often raised to put everyone else first: our families, parents, siblings, spouses, children, and even our communities. However, this self-sacrifice can come at a great cost to our own health and well-being. Francelys Infante knows this all too well. The entrepreneur and wife of the Latin superstar and Bachata king Romeo Santos faced a life-changing moment that forced her to reevaluate everything. Last fall, the mother of three suffered three brain aneurysms — a near-death experience that completely changed her life and led her to a new goal: educating women, especially mothers, about the importance of prioritizing their health.

When Infante first suffered from severe migraines late last year, she initially dismissed it as exhaustion from raising her three children.

“It started off as a normal headache, but then it became nighttime and I was FaceTiming with my husband and I told him, ‘I can’t even look at you with my eyes. I feel like I’m going blind.’ pounds in a way I’ve never experienced before,” she says.

A few minutes later, Infante took some painkillers before going to sleep, but woke up the next morning to find her symptoms had gotten significantly worse. She had severe pain on the left side of her head and her neck, which prompted her to finally call her doctor.

Today, Infante believes her body has been signaling for her to slow down for some time. But she ignored them because of the weight of her motherly responsibilities.

“In August (of that year), while I was training, I tore my hip flexor and was in so much pain. So they sent me to do an MRI. I did an MRI for my hip flexor, (but) there was told something For me, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to do the whole scan of everything,” she says. “I kept putting it off. I put it off so many times. I never had the time, so the day I got a headache I called my doctor, she said, what happened to the scans you were going to do? I said, ‘I don’t know. I haven’t had time.’”

Infante, who lives in Florida with her family, was in New York City at the time and had no immediate plans to fly back, so her doctor made sure she got an appointment to see what was going on. What the now 39-year-old didn’t expect to hear was that the painful migraines were actually brain aneurysms.

“A few hours later, I had a telehealth call with my doctor, the neurologist, the coordinator, and my husband, and they pretty much said, ‘You have to have surgery today. You’ve had two brain aneurysms,’” she shares.

In less than 48 hours, Infante had to board a plane to Miami to undergo brain surgery that she had been warned by doctors that she might not wake up from.

“Imagine leaving your kids and your family and not knowing if you’re coming back, and then my son says, ‘Mom, who’s going to take care of me?’ And starts crying. I’m like, ‘Oh my god, he feels it.’ “I tried to be positive about it. It felt like God was trying to talk to me in different ways… My body was talking to me in different ways so that I would pay attention to it. First, I hurt my hip. and then the headache. Just to make me realize, ‘Hey, you could die.’”

According to Mayo Clinic, a brain aneurysm”is a bulge or ballooning in a blood vessel in the brainAlthough most brain aneurysms are small without minor symptoms and damage, a ruptured aneurysm can cause symptoms such as nausea and vomiting, stiff neck, blurred or double vision, sensitivity to light, seizures, drooping eyelid, loss of consciousness, confusion. and can quickly lead to a stroke or become life-threatening is more common in women by about 60 percent, with exposure for mothers being even higher. According to research, the third trimester of childbirth may be increase a woman’s chances of developing a brain aneurysm due to the significant changes in hormones and blood flow. In fact, the risk of a ruptured aneurysm is greater in the third semester and for six weeks after delivery, where Black and Latina women are twice as likely have a brain aneurysm rupture compared to their white counterparts.

As someone who chose to put her own needs and dreams aside for the betterment of her family, Infante says the successful surgery became her greatest revelation. It was the wake-up call she so desperately needed to finally find herself.

“I take care of everyone here and take care of everyone, make sure my house is always in order, because I have a whole team in my house. Moreover, sometimes, even with my husband’s things, there was just a lot going on. she says. “There was a part of me that was like, girl, come on. You are here. You barely made it and you’re not even living your dreams.”

Infante registered her beauty/wellness brand in 2016, but admits she didn’t do anything about it until after the surgery. She believes the brand has more goals today than when she initially came up with the idea.

‘It has a meaning. It used to be that way Not too broken for beauty but it just had to be makeup and beauty. Now it’s about wellness and beauty, and it has a message: you’re not too broken to be beautiful,” she says. ‘There are women who let themselves go. They can be housewives or even if you are single and work just takes over you, and you don’t make yourself a priority. If you’re not here today, life goes on, so you have to prioritize and take advantage of the time you have now, and that was my message and that’s the message I want to convey with my brand.”

Like many Latinas, Infante was raised to believe that to be a good woman, she had to put everyone else’s needs above her own and always with a smile on her face – a double standard rarely imposed on men. By the age of eleven, she had already learned how to prepare coffee, peel platanos and make breakfast.

“I was told that you have to be able to cook. My parents said things like ‘El día que tu te casas, no one wants a girl who can’t cook,’” she says. “My parents and their parents’ parents grew up in a male chauvinist time. Everything was machismo. The women had to stay home, cook and take care of the children, and that was it. That was your job.”

But after a near-fatal health crisis, Infante realizes that the best thing she can do for her children is take care of herself.

“I realized that my children need a happy and healthy mother,” she says. “My happiness lies in being creative and just coming up with really cool and fun ideas when it comes to beauty or fashion. That was something I no longer prioritized for myself. I didn’t put myself first at all. I was the last one, and now I’ve learned that I have to be first. So now if I want to do something for myself, I’m going to do it no matter what.”

In addition to building Not Too Broke For Beauty, Infante wants to raise awareness of brain aneurysms and inspire women to prioritize self-care.

Today, Infante respects her self-care by taking pilates classes almost daily, working out with her fitness trainer, making time for meditation, asking for help when she needs it, and getting as much sleep and rest as she can. while trying to manage her stress.

“Although a brain aneurysm may be genetic, the main cause is stress,” she says, noting the lack of information and conversations around aneurysms in Latin American communities. “In my family I’ve heard things like ‘Fulana se murio durminedo (Fulana died sleeping)’, that’s normal. It’s okay, but what can we do to prevent that? That’s why I talk about it and try to bring awareness to this.

Johanna Ferreira is the content director for PS Juntos. With over 10 years of experience, Johanna focuses on how intersectional identities are a central part of Latin culture. Previously, she spent nearly three years as deputy editor at HipLatina, and has freelanced for numerous media outlets, including Refinery29, Oprah magazine, Allure, InStyle and Well+Good. She has also moderated and spoken on numerous panels on Latin identity.